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Submitted by AA, 5/15/2002 2:37:36 PM [profile]
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The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington engineering mid-term. The answer was so "profound" that the Professor shared it with colleagues, and the sharing obviously hasn't ceased...

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or Endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote Proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law, (gas cools off when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

"First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let us look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added. This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa Banyan during my Freshman year, "...that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you.", and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then, #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze."

This student received the only A.


- Unknown
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Submitted by fhalim, 2/7/2005 7:03:36 PM [profile]
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When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile.

- Unknown
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Submitted by MissMorbidity, 6/6/2003 11:22:24 PM [profile]
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A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.

- Unknown
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Submitted by honeybunch, 10/23/2002 5:01:18 PM [profile]
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Should I smile because we are friends? Or cry because we'll never be anything more?


- Ian
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Submitted by anonymous, 9/21/2000 9:01:35 AM [profile]
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There are three types of people in this world: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen and those who wonder what happened.

- Mary Kay Ash
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Submitted by mskingofhearts, 7/17/2002 11:00:50 AM [profile]
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Work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt and dance like no one is watching.

- Randall G Leighton
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Submitted by Bananna, 11/14/2004 12:42:53 AM [profile]
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Sometimes people put up walls, not to keep others out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.

- Bananna
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Submitted by RoushChic04, 7/4/2003 7:31:11 PM [profile]
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I'm trying really hard not to cry over you because every tear is just one more reminder that I don't know how to let you go.

- Unknown
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Submitted by Anonymous, 10/3/2002 9:42:22 PM [profile]
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When we first talked to each other
I knew we would always be friends.
Our friendship has kept on growing
And I'll be here for you to the end.

You listen when I have a problem
And help dry the tears from my face.
You take away my sorrow
And put happiness in its place.

We can't forget the fun we've had
Laughing 'til our faces turn blue.
Talking of things only we find funny
People think we're insane-If they only knew!

I guess this is my way of saying thanks
For catching me when I fall.
Thanks once again for being such a good friend
And being here with me through it all.


- Rachel Ellis
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Submitted by Dark Child, 10/25/2003 3:42:40 PM [profile]
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I was standing in the park wondering why frisbees got bigger as they get closer. Then it hit me.

- Unknown
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