The Board Of Wisdom

The Best Quotes

("My Favorites" selections by users)
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  • 51

    A Favorite of
    2735 users

    "you never really stop loving someone. you just learn to try to live without them"

    - unknown
    More than 5 years ago by ashmae234  ID#:9387

  • 52

    A Favorite of
    2730 users

    The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington engineering mid-term. The answer was so "profound" that the Professor shared it with colleagues, and the sharing obviously hasn't ceased...

    Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or Endothermic (absorbs heat)?

    Most of the students wrote Proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law, (gas cools off when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

    "First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let us look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

    Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added. This gives two possibilities:

    1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

    2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

    So which is it?

    If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa Banyan during my Freshman year, "...that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you.", and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then, #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze."

    This student received the only A.

    - Unknown
    More than 10 years ago by AA  ID#:3972

  • 53

    A Favorite of
    2727 users

    "Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't."

    - Erica Jong
    More than 10 years ago by Sinetos  ID#:6967

  • 54

    A Favorite of
    2704 users

    Giving up doesn't always mean you are weak … sometimes it means that you are strong enough to let go

    - Unknown
    More than 5 years ago by wiseone  ID#:35163

  • 55

    A Favorite of
    2694 users

    There comes a point in your life when you realize who really matters, who never did, and who always will.

    - Unknown
    More than 5 years ago by Anonymous  ID#:10552

  • 56

    A Favorite of
    2692 users

    People have the right to be stupid. Some people abuse that privilege.

    - Unknown
    More than 10 years ago by Anonymous  ID#:4813

  • 57

    A Favorite of
    2676 users

    A LOGICAL SOLUTION.
    Now here is a problem that finally has a formula for getting to the bottom of an age old problem.
    From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:

    What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

    Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

    If:
    A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

    Then:

    H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
    8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
    and
    K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
    11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

    But,

    A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
    1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

    And,

    B-U-L-L-S-*-*-T
    2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

    AND, look how far a** kissing will take you.

    A-*-*-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
    1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

    So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bulls**t and A** Kissing that will put you over the top.

    - some big organization
    More than 5 years ago by skitzo  ID#:30309

  • 58

    A Favorite of
    2666 users

    "Everything is okay in the end, if it's not ok, then it's not the end."

    - Unknown
    More than 10 years ago by MissMorbidity  ID#:8311

  • 59

    A Favorite of
    2652 users

    I do it because i can, I can because I want to, I want to because you said I couldn't.

    - Unknown
    More than 5 years ago by xmaryx06  ID#:18616

  • 60

    A Favorite of
    2624 users

    If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it's yours. If it does not come back, it was never meant to be.

    - Unknown
    More than 10 years ago by Bob  ID#:171
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