THINGS TO DO AT WALMART WHILE YOUR SPOUSE IS TAKING HIS/HER SWEET TIME....
*Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
*Set all alarm clocks to go off at 10 minute intervals
*Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
*Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an offical tone, "I think we have a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens
*Put M&M's on lay way
*Move caution wet floor signs to carpet areas.
*Set up a tent in the camping department , tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows form the bedding department.
*When someone asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people leave me alone."
*Look right into the video camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
*Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme to Mission Impossible.
*Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through whisper "Pick me, Pick me!!!!"
*When an annoucement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal position and scream "No! No! It's not those voices again."
*Go into the fitting room and yell real loud...."Hey we're out of toilet paper in here!"