A Favorite of 3802 users
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.)
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap,"
(and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time)?
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious)
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, ooh...fly Delta?)
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my ..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity.- *email*
A Favorite of 1511 users
Why Girls Love Guys:
1.The way they act so innocent sometimes
2.The way they laugh
3.The way they smile
4.The way they get confused
5.The way they look into your eyes and make everything even just for a second go away
6.The way they touch you just to let you know he is there
7.The way they try to defend themselves when you tease them
8.The way he stares at you when you are walking down the hall even though his best friend is telling him the scores of last nights big game
9.The way they seem to pop out of nowhere and slip their arms around you
10.The way you fit just right in his arms
11.The way he gets embarrassed when he does something clutzy around you and tries to cover it up
12.The way they kiss you when you just had a big fight
13.The way they kiss you when your day has gone completely wrong
14.Actually just the way they kiss you
15.The way when you hug them they feel exactly like your childhood teddy bear
16.The way they can stay on the phone for hours even if he doesnt have much to say
17.The way he looks at you when he thinks you are asleep
18.The way he says "you look beautiful" even though you are just in jeans and a t-shirt
19.The way they stare at you in class and then still stare after he has gotten in trouble for not paying attention
20. The way they say "I LOVE YOU"- Allison, Jessica, Jessica, Six, and Betty
A Favorite of 1393 users
Why Guys Love Girls:
1.The way they always smell good even if it's just shampoo
2.The way they always find the right spot on our shoulder
3.How cute they look when they sleep
4.The ease in which they fit into our arms
5.The way they kiss you and make everything alright in the world
6.How cute they are when they eat
7.The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end its all worth while
8.The way they are always warm even if its minus 30 degrees
9.The way they look good no matter what they wear
10.The way she fishes for compliments even though you both know shes the most beautiful thing on this earth
11.how cute they are when they argue
12.How their hand always seems to find ours
13.The way they smile
14.The way you feel when you see her name on the caller id after you've had a big fight
15.The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know an hour later...
16.The way they kiss you when youve done something nice for her
17.The way they kiss you when you say"i love you"
18.Actually.. just the way they kiss you
19.The way they fall into your arms when they cry
20.Then apologizing for crying over something that silly
21.The way they hit you and expect it to hurt
22.Then the way they apologize when it really does hurt (even though we dont admit it!)
23.The way they say "I miss you"
24.The way you miss them
25.The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesnt hurt her anymore...Yet regardless whether you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them... it matters not.Because once in your life whatever they were to the world they become the world to you.When you look them in the eyes traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without a trace of sound you know that your own life is inevitably consumed with the rhythmic beatings of her very own heart. We love them for a million reasons, no paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of a mind, but of the heart. A feeling. Only felt.- *email*
A Favorite of 1379 users
I want to be his favorite hello and his hardest goodbye....- Unknown
A Favorite of 931 users
I'm not afraid of heights, I'm afraid of falling. I'm not scared of the dark, I'm scared of what's in it. I'm not afraid to love, I'm afraid of not being loved back- Unknown
A Favorite of 548 users
I'm not gonna get drunk to please the crowd...
I'm not gonna be a slut and sleep around...
I'm gonna say what I think and say it loud...
I'm gonna say what I believe and I'm gonna stand proud....
I'm gonna be me, no matter who i'm around...- Unknown
A Favorite of 387 users
I met a boy today.....prepare to shatter- Unknown
A Favorite of 387 users
Someone should sue DISNEY
For PUTTING the thought
In little girls HEADS that
EVERYONE has a Prince Charming
And lives HAPPILY ever after...- Unknown
A Favorite of 332 users
I sit and listen to everyone else's love stories and I'm thinking to myself...
"Where's mine?"- Unknown
A Favorite of 303 users
He gets her out of bed in the morning..
drags her to school-
pulls her through her classes...
brightens up her day---
and he doesn't even know he does it*- Unknown