A Favorite of 50 users
I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.- Bull Durham
A Favorite of 1898 users
Imagine there is a bank account that credits your account each morning with $86,400. It carries over no balance from day to day.
Every evening the bank deletes whatever part of the balance you failed to use during the day. What would you do? Draw out every cent, of course?
Each of us has such a bank. It's name is TIME.
Every morning, it credits you with 86,400 seconds.
Every night it writes off as lost, whatever of this you have failed to invest to a good purpose.
It carries over no balance. It allows no over draft. Each day it opens a new account for you. Each night it burns the remains of the day.
If you fail to use the day's deposits, the loss is yours. There is no drawing against "tomorrow."
You must live in the present on today's deposits. Invest it so as to get from it the utmost in health, happiness and success!
The clock is running!! Make the most of today.
To realise the value of ONE YEAR, ask a student who failed a grade.
To realise the value of ONE MONTH, ask a mother who has given birth to a premature baby.
To realise the value of ONE WEEK, ask the editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realise the value of ONE HOUR, ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.
To realise the value of ONE MINUTE, ask a person who just missed a train.
To realise the value of ONE SECOND, ask someone who just avoided an accident.
To realise the value of ONE MILLISECOND, ask the person who won a silver medal at the Olympics.
Treasure every moment that you have! And treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time with. And remember time waits for no one.
Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why its called the present.
A Favorite of 37 users
Spiteful words hurt your feelings, but silence breaks your heart.- No sé
A Favorite of 569 users
We could all take a lesson from crayons: some are sharp, some are beautiful, some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they still learn to live in the same box.- No sé
A Favorite of 7 users
You have to take it all one day at a time. You cant change the past and it does no good to worry about the future.- Johna Moulton
A Favorite of 14 users
What is greater than God, More evil than the devil, The poor have it, The rich need it, And if you eat it, you'll die? Nothing.
Nothing is greater than God.
Nothing is more evil than the devil.
The poor have nothing.
The rich need nothing.
If you eat nothing, you will die.- from an email
A Favorite of 12 users
When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.- Jack Handey
A Favorite of 1 user
Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer.- Jack Handey
A Favorite of 1 user
The people in the village were real poor, so none of the children had any toys. But this one little boy had gotten an old enema bag and filled it with rocks, and he would go around and whap the other children across the face with it. Man, I think my heart almost broke. Later the boy came up and offered to give me the toy. This was too much! I reached out my hand, but then he ran away. I chased him down and took the enema bag. He cried a little, but that's the way of these people.- Jack Handey
A Favorite of 4 users
I bet that when the Neanderthal kids would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick, heavy brows." Then they would all get embarrassed because they remembered they had the big hunky brows too, and they'd get mad and eat the snowman.- Jack Handey